rrgirl writes in Hot Toast, Cool Toaster:
that’s a pretty ‘frig. Toaster might invite in some frozen pomegranate juice cubes and vodka for happie hour if he’s not driving.
Ooh! How cosmopolitan! We could have Drinkies with Keith Olbermann!
Bwana doesn’t have a car, so Toaster can’t drive. But even if Bwana did have a car, it wouldn’t work: Toaster’s legs are too short to reach the pedals.
rrgirl also adds:
while we’re singing the praises of myohio, don’t forget the Buckeyes, Football HOF and the Soap Box Derby.
Filed under: Our Happie Home
Blue Velvet contributes:
Boy, oh, boy!
Toaster would love to do a commercial! He’d be good at it.
- He’s very sincere.
- He emotes well.
- It’s only a short walk to Madison Avenue.
We’re going to ask Bwana’s agent to see if she can find a job in commercials for Toaster. He’d like to do something classy, like Laurence Olivier selling those cameras or Joe DiMaggio’s Mr. Coffee spots. Maybe he could be the national spokesman for Wonderbread:
He’s a wonderful little toaster ….
Blue Velvet contributes to Summer Solstice:
Here’s a companion to the “Keep cool!” dicta:
There sure are a lot of interesting things to see in Ohio!
Toaster would like his own snowdome. It’s been very hot here. Bwana put him in the freezer so he could keep cool:
Toaster likes hanging out with the Eggo Waffles ….
may I recommend a recent discovery to Toaster? it took half a century for me to try a crumpet – maybe it took that long for Trader Joe’s to arrive with cinnamon crumpets, and my goal is to leave the store with something new, every visit. anyway, the toasted crumpet is almost entirely crumbless, and oooh so wonderful with a little whipped honey butter.
fingers may be a little sticky for the Etch-a-Sketch though. I like crumpets early in the day, followed by a shower.
Toaster thinks crumpets are very British and very cool.
Do they come gluten-free for Bwana?
We’ll try to get some on the breakfast table for Bwana and Bwanette.
Just in time for Wimbledon ….
Filed under: Our Happie Home
Useful if Bwana proves irritable towards Toaster. Or may be used for Bwana behavioral conditioning.
Bwana would never ever poke Toaster with anything and Toaster would never ever shock Bwana!
If anything gets stuck in Toaster all you need to do is ask nicely and he will work his little Toaster Magic and release it. English muffins are pretty fat, though, so if one of those gets stuck Bwana has Toaster make like an Etch-A-Sketch, turning him upside-down and shaking him. Toaster thinks it’s quite fun, but if he gets shaken too hard he needs a couple of days to recover.
This is very entertaining: Online Etch-A-Sketch. Except that I’m getting Carpal Mattress Syndrome from using it so much.
Filed under: Things That Toaster Likes, Things To Do with Your Toaster
Toaster is very happy to get to go to work with Bwana today on Take Your Dog to Work Day. Toaster’s not a dog, but he has a lot of puppy-like qualities.
Toaster thought long and hard over how he wanted to help Bwana at the office. He usually likes to be a paperweight, but he wants to do something different today. A stapler is a useful office implement, but the violence with which it accomplishes its task was too scarey for Toaster to bear.
Bwanette thought that Toaster would make a very cute desk lamp:
He liked that idea a lot, but instead of holding a lightbulb he wanted to hold the Olympic flame and be like Candelabra:
Bwana didn’t think that was a good idea from a fire safety point-of-view. It wouldn’t be good if Toaster accidentally fell down, torched Bwana’s office, Rockefeller Center, and New York City — like Mrs. O’Leary’s cow did to Chicago.
Toaster finally decided on being a paperclip holder. Paperclips are an essential office supply and Toaster will do a good job taking care of the Clippies when they’re not holding together Bwana’s important papers.
Toaster will take a squeaky toy when he goes to work with Bwana. This way he can make friends with the canines who will be at the office today.
Filed under: Things That Toaster Likes
Toaster’s summertime reminders:
Protect yourself from the strong rays of the sun:
Drink plenty of fluids: