Filed under: MLB.TV, Obscure Cultural References, Things To Do with Your Toaster
rc, on Fire all of your guns at once and explode into space:
head out on the highway? bwana can’t drive so he can’t take them. maybe grammie?
Grammie would take them, but there’s no way she’s leaving New York during baseball season. Maybe they’ll Go Greyhound.
Omaha has a lot of fun things to do. Maybe Toaster and Hoodie will camp out there for a while and take in the 2007 College World Series.
Toaster would really like to see Warren Buffett’s piggy bank. For a guy who only makes $100,000 a year he sure got pretty darn rich. This goes to show how important it is to make wise investments. We wonder if Mr. Buffett collects baseball cards like Bwana.
Groucho likes Omaha.
Filed under: Things That Toaster Likes
Blue Velvet contributes:
I found a holiday for Toaster! Waffle Day
And a Mystery Science Theater 3000 song to go with it: The Waffle Song
Gosh! We missed International Waffle Day!
(I hope this doesn’t compromise our Nobel Prize application with the Royal Swedish Academy.)
Luckily, National Waffle Day isn’t until 24 August. Candelabra added a reminder to Toaster’s PDA so that he won’t forget.
Filed under: Let's Go Mets!
Mets hold open call for national anthem auditions
The Tofu Guys snuck out of the house this morning to audition to sing the “Star-Spangled Banner” at Shea Stadium. We hope they win. We also hope they don’t get confused and do their Mikado number.
Blue Velvet on Toaster, Ph.D.:
Toaster sounds like he would be perfect as panel member for the following:David Lynch Weekend
Wow! That sound very neat-o.
Maybe Hoodie will take Toaster to the midwest for the Pella, Iowa Tulip Time Festival (Hoodie likes to go there every spring) and then they can both go to the David Lynch Weekend in Fairfield. After that they can visit the Herbert Hoover Museum in West Branch, and then take in the Bob Feller Museum in Van Meter. They can also run over to Omaha and say hi to Warren Buffett before coming home.
Toaster works hard bringing joy and happiness into the world. He could use a little vacation.
Get your motor runnin’
Head out on the highway
Lookin’ for adventure
And whatever comes our way
Filed under: The Department of HappieHappieJoyJoy
Claremont University is offering a doctoral program in positive psychology, and we think Toaster would be the perfect candidate.
He has a very positive outlook on life.
He’s happy almost all the time.
I wonder if they would allow him to earn the degree online. I don’t think Bwana will let him go to California. New York already lost the Dodgers and the Giants to the Left Coast. We can’t lose Toaster, too.
Filed under: MLB.TV, Obscure Cultural References, Our Happie Home, Things That Toaster Likes
Sheila suggests a new hobby:
Toaster and Hoodie Bear could become Broadway Producers and do a Tofu version of the great Gilbert and Sullivan Operetta ‘The Mikado’.
Oh, boy! That could be great fun!
But between baseball and football seasons where will they find time to give their regards to Broadway?
(Click on the video player image — but not on the “Play” arrows! — to access this video directly from YouTube.)
Three little Tofu Guys from BwanaLand are we,
Pert as soybeans well can be,
Filled to the brim with proteinaceous glee
Three little Tofu Guys from BwanaLand!
(With apologies to Gilbert and Sullivan.)
Filed under: Our Happie Home, The Department of Laurels, Things to Eat, Who Maketh My Spirit to Shine
Blue Velvet comes to the rescue:
Toaster and Hoodie grabbed a box of crayons and will get right down to business and fill out the application.
They think Chemistry will be the right category:
The right to submit proposals for the award of the Nobel Prize in Chemistry, based on the principle of competence and universality, shall by statute be enjoyed by:
1. Swedish and foreign members of the Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences; …
We don’t know anyone in the Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences, but Toaster knows some French toast who, in turn, know a bunch of Swedish meatballs. This should help with the application process ….
Filed under: Thngs that Mattress Likes
Blue Velvet makes a literary contribution:
A Tim Burton poem for Mattress:
The Girl Who Turned into a Bed
It happened that day
she picked up a strange pussy willow.
Her head swelled up white
and a soft as a pillow.Her skin, which had turned
all flaky and rotten,
was now replaced
with 100% cotton.Through her organs and torso
she sprouted like wings,
a beautiful set
of matress and springs.It was so terribly strange
that I started to weep.
But at least after that
I had a nice place to sleep
Cool.
Mattresses are frequently unrecognized as muses of poetry.
Mattress loves Toaster
Hoodie, Tofu Guys … Bwana
Thus the happie life
Blue Velvet helps us build our vocabulary:
The “linguolabial trill” has a Bwana-esque sound to it, doesn’t it?
It sounds kind of erotic, if you ask me.
We think Bwana will like it!
Blue Velvet sends us:
A little appliance-based humor:
Wow! Neat-o keat-o!
Toaster is going to learn the song so that he can sing it to Bwana during breakfast on Monday.
Toaster also thinks that Mr. Banks should get the Nobel Prize for this song. Where do we send in a nomination?
The Tofu Guys want to know if Mr. Banks will write a Tofu Song.
Toast
by Heywood Banks
All around the country and coast to coast
People always say, “what do you like most?”
I don’t want to brag, I don’t want to boast
I always tell ‘em, “I like toast.”
YEAH, TOAST!!
YEAH, TOAST!!
I get up in the morning ‘bout six A.M.
Have a little jelly, have a little jam
Take a piece of bread, put it in the slot
Push down the lever and the wires get hot,
I get toast.
YEAH, TOAST!
YEAH, TOAST!
When the first caveman drove in from the drags
Didn’t know what would go with the bacon and the eggs
Must have met a genius, got it in his head
Plug the toaster in the wall, buy a bag of bread
Make toast.
YEAH, TOAST!
YEAH, TOAST!
Now, there’s no secret to toasting perfection
There’s a dial on the side and you make your selection
Push to the dark or the light and then
If it pops too soon, press down again
Make toast.
YEAH, TOAST!
YEAH, TOAST!
Oui Monsieur, bonjour coquette,
Une croissant? Et vous auvent?
Maurice Chevalier, Eiffel Tower,
Oui Marie, baguette, bonsoir!
FRENCH TOAST!
FRENCH TOAST!
In Chicago or (fill in location)…..
TOAST!!!!
Champ_des_Reves 
