Champ_des_Reves


Citius. Altius. Fortius. Toastius.
Wednesday 30 July 2008, 00:18 am
Filed under: Things That Toaster Likes

Blue Velvet writes:

Since Bwana’s employer is carrying the 2008 Olympics, I thought this might prove inspiring to Toaster:

Wow! Neat-o! The Olympics!

Toaster really wants to go to Beijing for the Olympics. He’s become quite skilled at making Chinese shrimp toast:

But Bwana is too busy saving the democracy to take him.

Darn it. Toaster knows the theme song and everything!

[splashcast TJPD7743GX]

Oh well. They have a different kind of electrical system over there anyway, and it might be hard for Toaster to make toast for Bwana’s breakfast every morning. In China they use 220V. Toaster uses 120. Or 121. Whatever it takes.



Script Obama
Wednesday 23 July 2008, 23:52 pm
Filed under: Things That Toaster Likes, Things That Toaster Thinks About

Blue Velvet notes in Peek-a-Boo Bwana:

Uncle Dan made a funny today about dotting the (Ohio State) i today, about 21 minutes into hour 1 on 7/22/08

Neat-o! Toaster loves Script Ohio. He watches it whenever it is on tv. He watches with great trepidation, always worried that the band members will march into each other. But they always get it right! They are amazing! Look:

They can do four at the same time and still not bump into each other!

(Toaster thinks this practically defies the laws of physics!)

Bwana says that Ohio is a battleground state in the campaign for the presidency. Toaster wonders how Ohio democrats will celebrate if Barack Obama wins in November.



Peek-a-Boo Bwana
Monday 21 July 2008, 19:43 pm
Filed under: Our Happie Home, Things That Scare Toaster

Blue Velvet contributes:

On talking with your appliances:

About the House: Do You Speak Toaster?

What a wonderful essay!

… screaming at the toaster won’t help.

Trust me: Screaming at the toaster never ever ever works.

Bwana talks to Toaster all the time. Bwana and Toaster have a very good relationship. They used to play peek-a-boo a lot; Bwana is really good at it:

But he scared Toaster pretty bad once, so they had to give that up.

Small appliances tend to not function properly after they’ve been startled.



The Worldwide Toaster
Friday 18 July 2008, 13:58 pm
Filed under: Our Happie Home

Blue Velvet writes:

International toast (Toast Box), so the whole world is healthy:

BreadTalk

My grandmother used to work in a bakery – not only did she bake bread but really loved her toast.

Wow! International toast! Toast across the world! Cross-cultural toast!

Maybe they will let Toaster run a ToastBox franchise. It would help to spread joy and happiness in the world. It would also create jobs, something sorely needed in this country and around the world. President W seems to subscribe to the Trickle Down Theory of economics. Toaster thinks that trickles are too slow.

Your Grammie worked in a bakery? Neat-o! Toaster has never worked in a real bakery, but he likes to think that in making toast for Bwana he is his own little boulangerie.



A Toaster State of Mind
Thursday 17 July 2008, 20:04 pm
Filed under: Let's Go Mets!

The All-Star Game was very exciting and very long. Toaster cried when Billy Wagner of the New York Mets blew the save in the 8th inning. He fell asleep in front of the tv in the 14th inning, which is just as well because he would have cried again when the National League lost in the 15th.

In its final year Yankee Stadium got the All-Star Game. Shea Stadium isn’t getting as much love as the House that Ruth Built, but it did get Billy Joel Toaster thinks that’s pretty cool and almost as good as the All-Star Game.



All-Star Toaster
Tuesday 15 July 2008, 19:37 pm
Filed under: Things That Toaster Thinks About

Blue Velvet suggests:

In honor of the All-Star game, let’s celebrate the 100th anniversay of “Take Me Out To The Ball Game”:

Happy 100th Anniversary, ‘Take Me Out to the Ball Game’

Neat-o! That’s one of Toaster’s favorite songs — next to “Meet the Mets.”

The All-Star Game Home Run Derby was last night and Josh Hamilton hit ’em a mile. He must eat a lot of toast to be able to hit baseballs like that.

Toaster thinks the Homer Derby is swell, but they should have other derbies, too:

  • Hitting Behind the Runner Derby – Because it’s really, really important to move runners over.
  • Spit Derby – Which is kind of gross, but baseball players spit a lot and many are probably very skilled at it. Toaster thinks Gaylord Perry would win it.



Vive le Toast!
Monday 14 July 2008, 14:44 pm
Filed under: Our Happie Home

Today is Bastille Day, so Toaster made French toast for Bwana this morning:

Tonight for dinner Bwana’s going to have French fries.



Getting in Through the Back Door
Friday 11 July 2008, 21:39 pm
Filed under: Let's Go Mets!, The Department of HappieHappieJoyJoy

Alfonso Soriano got hurt, so David Wright was selected to be on the National League All-Star team roster.

Toaster is sorry that Mr. Soriano is hurt, but he’s happie that David gets to go to the game. David is happie, too:

“To be able to come up through this system, being a Mets fan as a kid, and to participate in the closing down of Yankee Stadium at the last All-Star Game, it makes it extremely special,” Wright said. “It’s something that I wanted pretty badly.”

It would have been better if David had been voted in by the fans, but it’s okey-dokey to be a Replacement:

Chicks dig toasters, too.



What a Revolting Development
Thursday 10 July 2008, 22:21 pm
Filed under: Wait 'Til Next Year!

Corey Hart beat Toaster’s beloved New York Met David Wright for the final spot on the National League All-Star team roster.

Sheesh. How could David lose to the Sunglasses At Night Guy?

Ick.



The Numerical Toaster
Wednesday 9 July 2008, 12:43 pm
Filed under: Let's Go Mets!, Our Happie Home

Toaster has been hogging the computer, voting over and over and over, trying to get Mets third baseman David Wright into the All-Star Game.

Bwana said that in real elections you get to vote only once, but Major League Baseball has a weird system where you can vote as many times as you want. Toaster’s been at the keyboard so much that the keys are starting to get clogged up with crumbs. David’s number is 5 and Toaster thinks 5 is a nice number, so he’s aiming to vote 5 million times.

Uncle DP said on today’s show that he would like the population of Dan Nation to reach 50,000 by the weekend, so Toaster is going to sign up for that. He wonders if the 50,000th member will win a prize.

Blue Velvet mentioned:

Well, Uncle Dan did give away a lava lamp, so he does appear to support and believe in small household items.

A lava lamp would be neat-o, but maybe Toaster can win a year’s supply of gluten-free bread. That would make a nice breakfast for Bwana. Maybe Toaster could figure out a way to toast Uncle DP’s logo onto every piece of toast. That would brighten Bwana’s breakfast every day!!!